Making you a grill master, whether you like it or not

The idea of a boot camp is daunting, especially for the British, who must imagine they'll be locked in a car trunk the entire time. For a boot camp even British slang couldn't ruin, check out BBQ Boot Camp.

All based at a ranch about 90min outside of LA (near the small, originally Danish town of Solvang), BBQ BC is the first-ever open-to-the-public meat-tastic training course in grilling like the pros featuring lessons and hands-on demos from award-winning chefs so lauded, they didn't even have to look up that word. The weekend starts with the first of many monstrous wine-paired feasts, where you'll be given a leather-bound notebook full of grill recipes and tips; the next day, you'll be enthralled by seminars covering everything from what part of the animal makes up which cut of beef, to how long to properly grill salmon, to how to make your own at-home smoker, though if you've already got an apple and a Bic pen, you can probably skip that one. Following more gluttony, the final day's got a hands-on spice rub-making session and an interactive cook-with-the-chefs dinner, where you can ply specially selected, uber-high-end cuts of chicken/ steak/ pork chops/ fish with that rub, depending on how well they tip.

And though the BBQ weekend is still a few months away (but seriously book it now, as it will sell out immediately) you can head up to the ranch right now for great ongoing stuff like golf/ hiking/ pampering, as well as the occasional horseback riding-focused cowboy boot camps, which're even more daunting to the British, as even the bigger saddle bags are much smaller than a trunk.