Travel

Collecting matchbooks might actually be the best reason to go to India

Quick: name the raddest reason to travel to India. "The Taj Majal." WRONG. "Rivers full of excrement." Gross -- WRONG. "Cricket." Lame, WRONG. "I love Hoosiers." Indiana -- WRONG. The correct answer is to collect their asininely glorious cache of vintage matchbook covers! Don't believe us? Just check out this crazy collection...Puff, puff, pass, devilish red monkeys.Indian equivalent of a rabbit's foot.That deer's screwed.At once bow and arrow.Ohhhhh, that's what she meant she got in India...Seriously, what deer? Isn't that a polar bear with abnormally large ears?And when you gaze long into a matchbox, the matchbox also gazes into you.Because even when you're in love with an elephant, it's good to have a trident handy just in case.Indeed.Heh, heh, heh, heh.Duel, my ass... that elephant's trunk is toast.Apparently the deluxe version of the universe gets surrounded by a gigantic alien space craft and the oceans are filled with blood.In India, cars have no doors.That ship is sooooo not new.