2. Villa Tinto
What to expect: Belgium's better known for waffles than women, but prostitution is very much legal here. The pristine-looking district -- a three-block “tolerance zone” established by the government in 2000 (think Hamsterdam from The Wire) -- is one of the safest and cleanest red light districts in the world. Similar to Amsterdam's De Wallen, expect to window shop, as young scantily clad women in Antwerp also peddle their wares behind storefront glass.
The city's best brothel, Villa Tinto, has been dubbed “Europe's most high-tech bordello” and boasts 51 suites, safes to store cash, a biometric scanner to identify workers, an onsite police station, a panic button under the beds for the women's safety, and a control room to oversee the operation. There are also massage parlors and strip clubs that offer sex shows, where, for example, you can pay to watch a monkey slap a naked woman. We're just reporting the facts.
What it’ll cost: Full-release massages start at about $66 (€60). Or, for just under $2.20 (€2), you get about 90 seconds of action in one of the peep shows. Window prostitutes start at the standard rate of $55 (€50) for 15 minutes, although you can pay more for extras like kissing and not having to use a condom. Bonus STDs, however -- totally free!
Be warned: While the ladies working in the windows are regulated, the street hustlers are not. Best stay away from the woman who comments on how much she loves your sweet new fade.
Did you know: Seventy percent of the prostitutes working in Belgium are Bulgarian. So, hope you like Bulgarians.