Want to steal the bathrobe? Do it IMMEDIATELY*.
Robes are comfier on vacation -- the exact reason for this, we’ll never know. But simply taking one when you check out doesn’t work because THEY'LL CHARGE YOU when they realize it's missing. That's the exact reason they have your credit card on file. However, shoving that same robe into your suitcase as soon as you arrive and then calling down later that night to report your room wasn’t replenished with this amazing, plush amenity that you must wear right now, well, that just might work. It happens all the time.
*Not that we condone stealing; this is for informational purposes only.
Being a "regular" opens doors
If you get sent to a city regularly for business, make a point to stay at the same hotel each trip. The employees will learn your face, name, and your propensity to treat them with kindness and $20 bills (we told you to tip and we meant it), and will likely return that generosity with nicer rooms and complimentary swag.
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Nadia Imafidon is a Kansas-based magazine editor, freelance writer, and singer in soul/funk band Sharp 9. Follow her on Twitter at @nadia_imafidon.