How to behave like the gentleman you aren't at the Royal Ascot’s Royal Enclosure

Ah, Ascot. It's basically Britain's Kentucky Derby, and while you may not have to be in the Queen's immediate family to get into the Royal Enclosure for the five day meet from June 18–22 this year, you will have to act like it... which, disappointingly, does not involve learning how to play strip-billiards in Vegas. What does it entail? Read on!Overseas visitors have to apply for access through the Royal Enclosure Office. Apparently, entry mostly depends on how awesome your hat is. Once inside, men are required to wear “either black or gray morning dress, including a waistcoat and tie, with a top hat and shoes”. And shoes?! Ooh la-la, well okay your majesty.While encouraging the horse you wagered on with yells of “Get up!”, and "It's only a broken leg! You have three others!" is common-practice at an American horse race, the Brits in the Royal Enclosure have figured out that yelling at your pony doesn’t really impact him or her. Maintain the stiff upper lip by occupying it with a glass of Pimms throughout the race. After the races, head to Bessborough Restaurant, adjacent to the Royal Enclosure, and have yourself a Beluga Vodka Bubble (“a liquid wrapped inside itself that, once eaten, gently explodes to reveal a shot of Beluga”) and a Nitrogen Cocktail Sorbet, as is, er, traditional.