They repeatedly remind you that they're a local celebrity
"We are a local celebrity family know for taking ordinary places and transforming them using modern design, music, art and food as our magic creating them into extraordinary spaces... Our home is in a very popular urban setting... Some guests say it feels a bit like a mini Manhattan... We are a very social and well known family in Portland and do host special events from time to time. Guests are welcome to join us."
Also, they "work hard to wowza you." Also, also, you’ll be sharing the bathroom with an "employee from the taco cart." Naturally. (Portland; full listing)
They compose entire sentences from smiley faces
"Due to the regrettable fact that my time on Earth is FINITE and there's so much to see & do in the balance of my remaining days, I do not own a TV... HOWEVER comma my building is across the street from the Atlanta Library which, incidentally, is a stunning example of Bauhaus architecture, designed by the 20th century master of Modernism, Marcel Breuer.
":-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)"
Oh yeah, and they talk about their last days on Earth. Very openly. (Atlanta; full listing)
They make really dark jokes, but don't specify that they're joking
"Absolutely no smoking without a plastic bag over your head."
Wait, where are the smiley faces!?!? (Seattle; full listing)