Billed as Boston's oldest and most storied hotel, this historic, 551-room landmark opened downtown in 1855 and lays claim to having hosted literature's legendary Saturday Club (Longfellow, Emerson, John Oliver Wendell Holmes), inventing the Boston Cream Pie, and serving as ground zero for JFK's no-doubt-epic bachelor party
Renting a room means you join every President since Ulysses S. Grant in the distinct honor of having stayed at the Omni Parker. Now try not to make an ass out of yourself
Who wants the top bunk?!? Just kidding, that's for the kids
You'll probably be more comfortable in the Harvey Parker Suite, which boasts a Jacuzzi tub, dining area for eight, views of the Custom House clock tower, and a handsome portrait of hotel proprietor Harvey Parker.
Assuming you have a big announcement to make before dinner, best to make it in the Omni's historic press room, where JFK first declared his candidacy for Congress
For dinner, hit their definitely-not-Peter Parker's Restaurant for fresh scrod, a term for cod, haddock, or whitefish that's origins have been credited to... wait for it... the chefs at the Omni Parker (!!
Finally, remember that scene in Titanic where the dudes all adjourn after Leo's fanciful speech for brandy and cigars in the smoking room? Well, welcome to it, but in Boston's most famous whiskey bar, the Last Hurrah. It'll be all business and politics...