A suite with a slide and your own personal genie
The coup de grace of this 1,188-foot human pinball machine is the Ultimate Family Suite. Though it stops just short of having a train running through the living room, it reps some serious Silver Spoons shit. Imagine Ricky Stratton speeding down a two-story slide from his private, oceanfront bedroom, past a floor-to-ceiling Lego wall, into a brightly colored common area. That’s what Royal Caribbean is offering here.
Also included is a 3-D-style TV room with its own popcorn machine, and every video game system you never got for Christmas. The two-bedroom, two-story, 1,346-square-foot suite boasts a 212 square-foot wraparound balcony with a bumper pool table, a climbing wall, and a whirlpool. And it comes with something called a Royal Genie, who probably won’t crack frenetic, improvised jokes that are way funnier to the parents than the kids. But will at least make sure you have whatever you need whenever you need it.