Travel

Rappel into the world's largest cave

First discovered by a Vietnamese local in 1991, Son Doong was later explored, Discovery-style, by a British expedition team in 2009; they subsequently declared it the world's largest cave. Now, 20 damn years later, it's finally opening up in 2014 for tourists interested in six-day tours.

Venture deep into the Phong Nha-K? Bàng National Park in Qu?ng Bình, Vietnam to take a gander at the "mountain river cave" that was created by river water eroding limestone as it flowed under the mountains. Apparently this all happened around "2-5 million years ago" so, much like the Dominican Republic Little League team, it has no idea when it was born.

After trekking nearly four miles, you'll camp overnight. Day two'll see you hiking into the colossus, where you'll take a 90yd vertical plunge in the mouth of the beast.

Yeah, there's a reason this is called the "Loong Con" cave... and that's cause the dude above just navy-sealed himself down hundreds of feet.

Once the nerves calm, those now-steady hands will make the first underground river crossing and lead you into the gigantic main tunnel. It's here you'll set up camp and finally be able to whip out your acoustic guitar for all the non-existent babes.

Pass by 650ft cliffs to emerge in a small jungle within the cave, then set up a beach camp. Now sit back & take in the sights and sounds of monkeys, hornbills, and "flying foxes", presumably all jetting around in their Arwing to protect that IDIOT Slippy Toad.

Ever deeper in the Doong, there'll be small shallow pools, like in the "Ken" cave -- better known as: "the other Ryu".

Finally there's the mighty 200ft "Great Wall of Vietnam", which famously halted the mongol hoard British team's first expedition.

The last day of your adventure will consist of exiting the cave and spending a night in the jungle, which will make this the most exciting trip you'll have for the next 20 damn years.