Nude beach bans boners


Nude beaches seem like a place where you can check your cares (and swimsuit) at the gate. But the first of its kind in South Africa says otherwise through a bulging list of rules -- including one that urges men to cover up their "unpredictable erections".

Along with the boner ban, South Africa’s soon-to-open nude spot, Trafalgar Beach -- which became officially nude in November -- prohibits visitors from dancing provocatively or taking photos without consent, among its 19 firm rules. But the covering up erections has proved the most excitable matter.

"We know they sometimes happen beyond your control”, the code says. “A simple towel covering it up or lying on your front, and no one will notice.” 

The code of rules seeks to harness “a harmonious environment where everyone gets along”, so naturally, it bans staring (“it’s rude whether you have clothes on or not”); obscene language; erotic material; sitting on or touching genitals (who would sit on their own genitals?); making out; and pole dancing. Visitors are also encouraged to take their own towels to sit on, for hygiene reasons.

Really, it's just like being at a normal beach, but nobody is wearing clothes. And you don't have a waistband to do a boner tuck.

Trafalgar Beach is expected to open spring 2015.

Chloe Pantazi is an editorial assistant on Thrillist's travel team. Yes, that's a British accent. No, she doesn't watch Doctor Who. Follow her on Twitter at @ChloePantazi.