S ay this for Vegas: No matter how idiotic your decisions here, someone nearby has just one-upped you. They've jumped into a pool with their phone in their jeans. They've taken so many shots that yet another round of shots sounded wise. Or maybe they've just hit on 12 -- everything's relative. Sure, places like New Orleans and Austin have their shares of tourists behaving badly, but Vegas has staked its entire reputation (and built a whole tourism marketing campaign) around fucking up. Mistakes here aren't just part of life. They're not even a way of life. They're the reason almost anyone in this town even has a job. Vegas is the mistake-industrial complex in full effect.
Certain things you know will stay in Vegas (your last five weeks' pay at the craps table, for instance). Others seriously will follow you around. So don't get dismembered. Don't get heat stroke. Don't wind up with a felony record. And don't start acting like a poor person's idea of a high roller. To have a good time and maybe not totally hate yourself at the end of it, keep reading. These are the things that everyone, at some point, will get wrong.