Here's something no one has ever said: "Man, I wish that roller coaster was entirely powered by human pedaling!" Because really, amusement parks are frightening enough without introducing even more human error into the equation.
But at Ai Pioppi, a completely unattended, human-powered amusement park in Italy, somebody made no one's wish a reality. In fact, no ride is guaranteed to keep you safe. Let the rider beware.
YouTube blogger Tom Scott explored the terrifying theme park this weekend, documenting his experience in the death-trap north of Venice. Scott barreled down dingy, rust-ridden tracks, tackled creepy-looking sleds, and braved the Wheel of Death -- a horrifying, pedal-powered ride that flips you upside down at vomit-inducing angles. Yep, it's not enough for the machine to just torture you; YOU have to torture you.
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According to Scott’s YouTube description, the man-made amusement park was constructed by a restaurateur named Bruno who taught himself to weld, and subsequently, built the park next to his restaurant. Because nothing caps a fine meal quite like getting your pasta a la carbonara all up on your T-shirt.
As Scott warns viewers, “if you don't take the right amount of caution, it can hurt you." Well, duh. And true enough, Scott ended up needing seven stitches before he left -- NOT from the Wheel of Death, but rather just from tripping in the park.
You should only be so lucky.
Chloe Pantazi is an editorial assistant on Thrillist's travel team. Yes, that's a British accent. No, she doesn't watch Doctor Who. Follow her on Twitter at @ChloePantazi.