The dude behind the dong says it's more of a curse than a blessing, as it prevents him from holding down a job, maintaining a relationship, or even kneeling in church. Although, why kneel when you've got a kickstand?
Esquivel's even had it examined by doctors from his hometown of Saltillo, who apparently determined that only six of those inches actually belong to the main part of his penis: the rest is "extra skin," which one doctor says could be shaved down with a shaft reduction operation. According to TMZ, America's most trusted news source, the pornographers at Vivid have offered to fund Esquivel's significant shrinkage, even if they're unable to secure the rights to his sex tape. Warms the cockles of your heart, doesn't it?