Go off the beaten path at this Alphabet City bungalow

If you think New York hotels feel perpetually overrun by throngs of non-celebrities inexplicably wearing shades inside, or wonder why Paul Oakenfold is performing in the corner of your lobby, then trade in those bottomless brunch oontz-fests for the Manhattan Carriage House, an Airbnb listing equipped with one fire place, two beds, and four -- count 'em, FOUR -- cats. Yes, you will have to feed them

The bedroom features a wooden couch of questionable comfort, ensuring guests won't be overstaying their welcome and bothering you late into the night

In the living room, you'll find a much more comfortable wooden couch (it has a pad!) and an acoustic guitar, perfect for ironically jamming out the opening riff of "Wish You Were Here"

The kitchen has old-school charm, and is definitely built for hobbits if that Campbell's soup can on the refrigerator turns out to not be novelty sized

Outside you'll have a great front porch where you can sit and people watch, or people annoy, if you choose to bring the acoustic guitar out there

Also outside, you'll find a de-constructed chesterfield lounge spanning a few cinder blocks, unquestionably the coolest wooden couch in the place

photos: AirBnB