Colorful and comfortable rooms await your downtown visit

Just like the famed pepper found in the mountainous regions of the Mexican states of Puebla and Hidalgo, Serrano's a spicy-hot, four-star boutique hotel located just blocks away from Union Square that features in-room spa services and a Yoga channel on every TV, making the painstaking task of finding your chi easier than ever

Upon entering Serrano, take some time to sit on their plush red sofas, which are sofaking comfortable you just might stay there for the evening. Unless someone shows up ripping off old SNL jokes.

Because your mad thirsty from traveling and could totally eat something because your fat, check out next-door Jasper's Corner Tap & Kitchen

Three taps are dedicated exclusively to 'tails like the Ruby Summer (a carbonated mix of vodka, Lillet Rose, Licor 43, raspberry, lime, and Bolivar bitters), while six pour out wine

For sustenance, try the signature cheeseburgers, topped with jack cheese and dropped on a housemade rosemary focaccia bun

Oh man, is that, like, many more than one burger? Get those too

Once you finish all that exhausting eating and drinking, you'll retire to whichever of the seven room styles you opted for, which run the gamut from standard Queens to Executive Suites. Between the in-room spa treatment and the Nintendo, you may never go out again