State-wide savings for serious 'cue chasers

People travel for all kinds of reasons -- to get away from it all, to find themselves, or to find that gnome, and see if he'll finance the production of your movie script, A Gnome Named Gnorm -- but who are you kidding, no one would be stupid enough to make that movie! Now, go on a far meatier quest, with The Q Card.

From the guy behind the ManUpTexasBBQ blog and the Austin 'cue-off Gettin' Sauced comes the Q Card: already good at dozens of restaurants statewide, it offers with-purchase hookups ranging from 10% off your meal (or 10% off per-pound), to half-off 2nd entrees, to free drinks, sides & desserts (pecan cobblers, etc.), to specialized bonuses like a free jar of smoked jalapenos -- so much fire, you'll only be able to look at it with your Left Eye. North and Central affiliates include Sherman's pulled-pork haven Cackle & Oink, the Stockyards Cooper's, and Godfrey's Taste of TX in Pflugerville (oak-smoked pig & brisket); Austin's repped by the Sugar Shack (home of the "Notorious P.I.G.") and Blue Ribbon, where eating the melty-fat brisket's almost as religious an experience as a bris cut. Jump on 183 to hit Lockhart's Black's (giant-ass beef ribs since 1932), or take 35 to San Antonio for Two Bros pork loin and bacon-covered jalapenos; get carded at Beaver's in Houston, where slow-smoked beef shoulder rubs elbows with fancier stuff like smoked lamb, and in Tyler, taste award-winning ribs at Stanley's, who thanks to the relentless criticism of Hardy, never rests on his Laurels.

You can also hit retailers like Barbecues Galore, Taste of Texas in Austin, or Wild Bill's Texas Gourmet Foods for discounts on everything you'll need to smoke at home -- something you must be doing plenty of if you think screen legend Anthony Michael Hall is going to star in your dumbass movie!