True story. Seriously, one $25 16-ounce jar of this stuff procures up to 25 cocktails from the comfort of your home. All you do is add sparkling water, ice, and your spirit of choice, and BOOM, instant cocktail. Courtesy of Montreal's Old Faithful Shop, this flavored concentrate is the low-calorie, low-sugar substitute for soda you've been looking for since the invention of Coke—that's like...129 years!
*not included: steroids.