How To Make Homemade Fireball
Cinnamon is becoming a real scene, man.
The misunderstood spice has made its way out of the shot glasses of college kids and found a nice little spot in the hearts of Americans everywhere. With companies like Jim Beam and Jack Daniels spicing up their game, so to speak, it has become obvious that cinnamon booze is more than a trend: it's a vague movement.
So, by way of a company that specializes in moonshine still kits, we got our hands on some delicious FireBomb Cinnamon Spice. Regardless of a recent run-in with a stroke-inducing piece of spicy candy, I decided it would be best to make some homemade bastard Fireball. You only need four items: apple juice, Everclear, spices, and...fun. You have to have fun in order to make this.
This is how you make homemade Fireball. Try this at home.
1. Use the Internet
If you own a computer machine, log on and open the browser of your choosing. You can use Google or Yahoo—heck, you can even use Bing! Use the Internet to order some FireBomb mix. A single tin is available on Clawhammer Supply and it only costs $15. That's less money than 15 tacos from Taco Bell.
2. Check out those hot spices
Open your tin and observe the brilliance of four different types of peppers. I made the mistake of taking a huge whiff of this stuff. The Thai peppercorns burned my lungs like mustard gas and caused a general feeling of asphyxiation. It was pretty rad.
3. Mix apple juice with Everclear
Find the vessel of your choice (I used a $4 plastic jug from Duane Reade that may cause birth defects) and combined the FireBomb mix with four cups of apple juice and seven cups of 80 proof Everclear. Be careful with the Everclear, because it might lead to impregnation and good vibes.
Your lethal concoction of Everclear, apple juice, and hot peppers needs some time to soak. Leave it in a refrigerator for at least two days. If you're worried about people stealing it—don't. This stuff looks like it was scooped out of a pond in India. No one in their right mind would swipe it. Unrelated: Wandering Bear Coffee is pretty legit and definitely tastes better than this stuff.
5. Strain it!
See all those floating bits in there? You do not want that in your glass. Or maybe you do, you freaky minx. Strain it all into a handsome container and drink responsibly.
6. Drink it up
Now that you've successfully made your own bastardized Fireball moonshine, you can relish the fruits of your labor. True, it's not actually whiskey—as making one spirit out of another is about as legitimate as phrenology.
Results? This stuff is actually incredibly tasty. Spicy, sweet-but-not-too-sweet, and you could barely even taste the Everclear. We've all been drinking it since 10 AM.