A Total Lack of Style
At this point, I've experimented with a ton of different sex toys at Supercompressor: The AutoBlow 2, Pulse, and—of course—all those Fleshlights incubating in my closet. For the most part, they all have one thing in common: style.
Sure, the Autoblow is a bit clunky and its permanent wry grin is the stuff nightmares are made of...but it works. Each aforementioned toy is sleek, unobtrusive, and pretty subtle.
The Handie looks like the syphilitic hand of a 19th century street walker in London. How could anyone possibly retain any semblance of an erection with this thing attached to them? It's like the combined wet dream of David Lynch and David Cronenberg.