Thirsty Thursday: The Unforgivingly Sexy Thanksgiving Edition

Thanksgiving, right? More like ThanksBORING. Naw, just kidding. We love our turkey and all the great feelings of joy that come from sitting around the table with our families, stuffing our gullets with the flesh of a medically-obese bird.

And to help ease that holiday stress you're definitely feeling right now, we've assembled four fine bottles of Thanksgiving-themed booze that'll work alongside the tryptophan to gently ease you into minor holiday coma. Enjoy and bless your little heart.

Our favorite bougie French liqueur is now available in one liter carafes—and you know what that means: maximum holiday cocktails. Pop it open and give yourself a post-turkey (or pre-turkey) drink. Go for the classic St-Germain cocktail—champagne, seltzer, and lemon. Each 20% ABV carafe makes up to five drinks and we urge you to share with your friend...or, you know, don't. 

DeLeon Tequila—$189
Know why you should get your hands on a bottle of DeLeon, because Puff Daddy made it. That's right, Puffy does with DeLeon what Clooney did with Casamigos. This line, starting at $60, involves six 40% ABV bottles that each have their own flavor profiles and personalities. If this stuff reflects Diddy's production skills, we've got the liquid-version of Biggie Smalls on our hands—LITERALLY ON OUR HANDS. 

Patrón XO Cafe Incendio—$34
When you mix Patron tequila with Mexican árbol chile and Criollo chocolate, you get the exotic taste of Incendio. Just saying it makes you want to do a sexy dance with Catherine Zeta-Jones in a dimly-lit club in Mexico. This 30% ABV drink goes amazingly-well with pumpkin pie, which goes amazingly-well with turkey, which goes amazingly-well with seasonal depression. 

Éphémère Cranberry—$Varied
Good golly, that's an ass-load of accent marks. However, what else could you expect from a beer with roots firmly planted in Quebec? This 5.5% ABV cranberry (yep, like the cranberry you eat during Thanksgiving) white ale is brewed with fruit and has a delicate cranberry taste, alongside berries, barley, sugar, and rye bread. Here's your Thanksgiving in a bottle, people. 

Jeremy Glass is the Vice editor for Supercompressor and, this Thanksgiving, he's thankful for giblets.