This Guy is Using a Sex Doll to Sell a Car on eBay

At first glance, this looks like a totally normal Ebay listing for a VW Golf. It's listed to have a good (yup, that's the only adjective they give) engine, gearbox and clutch — plus it drives well. There are even some nice, simple pictures of the car. Numerous pictures with a model, in fact. One thing, though: that model is a sex doll. Enjoy... 

Yes, she has a name. It's Sandy. Apparently she's driven this car. Her review? "Tried it out to much delight." 

Here's Sandy by the front of the car, sporting some handsome khakis. 

Notice the way her corpse-like arms are bent towards the driver's side window. She thinks she's people.  

Bet your first glance wasn't at the tire, was it, you filthy animal? 

The descriptions underneath each photo reads like HAL 9000 dictating Japanese fan fiction. It's totally unsettling and nothing short of perfect. Thank you, United Kingdom, for this lovely piece of Internet. 

Jeremy Glass is the Vice editor for Supercompressor and takes sugar with coffee and cream.